Saturday, March 1, 2008

Pissing Away America (Don't worry: 'Pissing' is Biblical)

If you’re anything like me, you’ve asked yourself on more than one ocassion “What’s wrong with America?” Well friends, it’s right there in the bible. I know, I didn’t see it either, UNTIL NOW! (Watch the video below in its entirety--it's only four minutes long; you won’t be disappointed...well...on second thought, you probably will be deeply disappointed, but not in the fact that you watched it. And yes, I’m afraid it’s not a joke. I'm also guessing that he-who-must-not-be-named occupied the oval office at the time this sermon was preached.)




On a more serious note, things may be pretty quiet on Holy Skin and Bone over the next two weeks. I’m heading over to China on Tuesday to deliver a lecture on Pluralism, Relativism and Tolerance, and a series of lectures on Dualism, Materialism and Resurrection. I don’t know how accessible the internet will be while there, so, as I say, things may go quiet in these parts.

This is my second trip to China, and on this occasion I am delighted to be able to be taking my ten year old son, Rowan. Should be a lot of fun! (BTW: is there a better job anywhere on the planet than that of an academic? I mean, really? We may not make squat, but my-oh-my, the perks are pretty hard to beat.)

And let me tell you this, my friend-- while I’m in China, 'you better know I’m gonna stand up everywhere I go. Because 'I’m a man, not a male.' And btw, there is one Great Wall in China. So I'm thinkin' there should be plenty of opportunity for me to directly apply this sermon and so demonstrate my manliness. (Lord, have mercy on us all!)

12 comments:

Rachel said...

I'll echo your "Lord, have mercy!"

Anonymous said...

Hilarious

Lori said...

Wait. Wasn't it the [standing] men that were fixin' to feel God's wrath? Is this an oddly twisted suicide note? Seems like sitting down & staying away from the wall would be the wiser "stand", as it were!

Keith DeRose said...

I haven't studied the use of this "pisseth against the wall" phrase in the Bible like the pastor has. But I did read a blog post about it here. If that post is right, the phrase "is clearly a contemptuous, vulgar, and pejorative way to refer to men. Translating it simply as 'males' fails to convey the negative connotations of the original Hebrew." And isn't usually used when God's talking about people he's about to kill or something? Anyway, if the post is right, then it's even more funny (if that were possible) that this preacher grabbing onto it as something positive, in a "Yeah, I'm one of those real men who pisseth against walls and stuff, like God wants us to do" kinda way.

So, I hope this comment gets to you before you leave for China, Kev. The upshot of it all for you (supposing the post I link to is right) is: DON'T PISSETH AGAINST THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA!!

Kevin Corcoran said...

Lori/Keith,

Thank God I read yours comments before I got to China and that Great Wall, took a good look and...well...showered it with....urine. Poor Rowan could have come home fatherless, son of Jeroboam that I am!!!!

There are so many scary-funny elements to that sermon, it's hard to know where to begin.

So, do not fear! I will follow your advice and 'stand" with the ladies while in China.

Piss, my friends (I mean, PEACE, PEACE)my friends,

Kevin

Keith DeRose said...

Whew -- international incident avoided!

(I didn't see Lori's comment til I posted mine. We're going down the same path -- though I didn't have the perfect remark about the "wiser 'stand'.")

Keith DeRose said...

Oh, and have a great trip! I hope your talks go well and that you have a great time with Rowan.

Stephen Matheson said...

What a prick. I'm pissed. :-)

Rachel said...

oh man, I just looked at his website (faithfulwordbaptist.org) and it is SCARY! lot's of stuff about how gay people should get the death penalty and why it's evil for men to be gynecologists.

Anonymous said...

you guys have dispicable language for supposedly "Christian folk."

Kevin Corcoran said...

Anon:

Without a good reason for remaining anonymous, you should identify yourself. Also, I wonder, does "pissing" offend you? I wonder if it offends you (if it does) more than hate and war and torture and other dispicable human behaviors.

Anonymous said...

I'm a little behind, but I wanted to make a note here that girls also do not sit while using the toilet in China. They squat.